Oh no I've become one of those annoying people obsessed with their health and telling randoms about all their ailments! Usually I find those people annoying and now I'm one! Oh the irony! But I can't tell people outside of random internet land as real people think your hypochondriac however I am not a hypochondriac as real hypochondriacs don't think they are hypochondriacs! Although having said that I did tell my sister (then told her not to tell mum and dad as I didn't want them to worry). Then I told dad (and told him not to tell mum). Then I told mum (and told her I wasn't going to tell the aunty I'm living with as I was worried she would think I'm crazy) and then you guessed it I told my Aunty! Ha Ha I can't even keep my own secrets!!! Curse my honesty!
Ok so I had decided I had a brain tumour brought on by melanoma a while ago due to shaking hands, blurred vision and suspicious itchy mole but now I'm feeling a bit more optimistic and sane.
I recently went back to dermatologist and asked for her to look at the ugly mole again ( was a different lady this time and she seemed confident so I didn't build up enough crazies to demand a biopsy as I had originally thought I might). Surely two of them can't be wrong. Looked at new red dot and suspicious lump under armpit too (main reason for going even though I think it is more of a normal doctors job) and all clear *phew* Did build up enough crazies to tell her I was scared I had brain cancer because of that mole + shaking and blurry eyes. I even asked her if she could feel my glands under my neck as I think they are bigger than normal. She didn't think they were but wasn't sure. She says I should just get a blood test for other symptoms from a normal gp which I will think about if symptoms persist. ( yeah I'm going to be the weirdo they talk about in lunch break but I don't care).
Have noticed since returning from dermo I am not shaking as much so I am thinking anxiety is causing it (bit calmer now that melanoma is out of question). I also did notice it increased dramatically when I was in Dermo so yeah I think anxiety! I can't help it I worry about melanoma I have moles everywhere (and I do mean EVERYWHERE including where the sun don't shine!) The doctor man on the insurance phone (have an interesting insurance when I have to call medical people before being granted permission to see anyone) rang again today to ask if I was still shaking. I said only a little but I have been constantly thinking about it and looking at them so maybe thats why. My blurry vision is not so regular now (gone from serval times a day to just one or two times) which I think is because I've been taking Vit B and magnesium (told the phone doctor that too but will still see eye doctor since I haven't seen one ever and apparently your suppose to every 2 or so years and to be honest I'm curious to know what they do). Have agreed to call them in a month if shaking persists. Will be interesting to see if shaking stops now that I'm not thinking of a distinct deadline in which I need it to stop (all week I have been thinking oh no he is calling on wednesday this has to stop which may have made it persist). He suggests I take iron too (hmm vitamin cocktail growing here). On a side note Vitamin B makes piss turn radioactive yellow.
While I was in my insanity and looking up cancer very often I decided to stop looking up symptoms and start looking up solutions instead and I came across interesting ways people have got rid of it naturally. Some people are claiming to have beaten terminal cancer with just carrot juice! More commonly people have gone totally vegan and survived. Fascinating stuff really. I am more inclined to believe these people than the miracle drug people as they are not selling anything, unless they are carrot farmers which none of them seem to be. So I've started eating lots more carrots and veggies and less meat and dairy. Prevention is better than cure. Don't think I'm ready to drink/ eat 2.5 kg worth of carrots a day just on the off chance I have something but it's food for thought (yes I intended that pun). I did drink 1L of carrot juice today and have had carrots with lunch and will have with dinner though so lets see if I turn orange!
Still eating some meat and dairy though as I don't want to make dinners complicated for my Aunty for what I'm sure I will not maintain. Plus what's the point being in Switzerland if you don't eat the chocolate and cheese!?
Anyway now I have used some of my free time for my less crazy obsessions such as looking up MLP stuff and finally seeing all of the episodes of Ouran High School Host Club on youtube ( I love that series shame it was so short!).